Rant, ignore if you want

[tacuma]

I really don't know how to feel right now. Just half an hour ago my brother and sister in law visited us to tell that my sister in law is pregnant! ^___^ I'm so happy! I'm going to be an aunt (again! XD). The 'baby' is only 8 weeks old. Many things can happen, but we all hope everything will be alright.

But 10 minutes later my aunt called. She went to the hospital with my grandmother. It wasn't good. My grandmother might have cancer again. She had it last year. When she was finally healed, she broke her hip, twice and was in hospital for months! She is back at her home now for a month or something and now the doctor told her it might be wrong again >_< Makes me really sad.

Really don't know how to feel, happy or sad. Mixed up feelings >.<

Comments

[a1y-puff.livejournal.com]

Aww, Ann-chan *hugs*
I hope your grandma will be all right :(

And I understand the mixed feelings. You're happy for one thing and sad for another. Just.. Treat the feelings differently an occassion-based i guess?

(I dun think i helped there. Rawr. I'm a detached person so i can classify my feelings and used them occassion-based? ... I dun think i made sense, but yea, sth like that XD)

[a1y-puff.livejournal.com]

Ps. Sorry havent replied to ur email. The wifi in the cafe i went to today was so slow, i didnt even manage to dl Mona's bday present for me *wails*

[tacuma811.livejournal.com]

Do you want me to email Mona-chan's b-day present to you?

[a1y-puff.livejournal.com]

Aww, your boss is a meanie D:
Hang in there. Just a little bit more!

And thanks, that might help. Mediafire was being a jerk. It was only 19.5MB for God's sake. My bro dowoloades stuff over 100MB and he got them just fine. Darn MF. T.T

[tacuma811.livejournal.com]

Yes he is *sighs*
Sometimes I wish I could just cut his head off or something.

I'll send it to you then ^_^

[tacuma811.livejournal.com]

*hugs back* Thank you Ai-chan.
I hope so too >_<

Well, the sad feelings took over now >_< Today was supposed to be my last day at work. I was really happy today. But now my boss is stalking me again. Some things I did are not good enough and I have to do them again. He will tell me more about it tomorrow. I'm afraid I will have to do a lot of work again and I still have to write my reports for school.

Okay, I should be happy! I'm going to be an aunt! My brother will have a cute little baby at the end of this year ^__^ I really should cheer myself up.

[paranoid-fridge.livejournal.com]

*hugs* .... things sometimes do all have to happen at once, don't they?

Hope everything will work out fine for your grandmother - perhaps its not as bad as it seems and things will work out just fine ^^ I shall keep my fingers crossed But, waii~ I'm envious that you get to be an aunt (and what's that *again*? ^_~) That's really something to look forward to!

[tacuma811.livejournal.com]

*hugs back* Thank you
Yes, I'll just hope everything will work out fine with my grandmother.
My sister has two daughters already. I'm an aunt for more than 4 years already. But it will be my brothers first baby ^__^

[mitsu-syusuke.livejournal.com]

i hope everything will turn out fine for your grandma.. *hugs tight*

ivy

[tacuma811.livejournal.com]

*hugs back* Thank you

[speadee.livejournal.com]

Sorry it takes me forever to get back to you, and I missed your hard times as well as fanfics. School continues to be busy, and during breaks I have to be at my parents' house with computer limitations. I've also had computer problems the past few months. I wish we all had more time.

Sorry about your aunt. I hope she doesn't have anything serious. Two of my grandparents died of cancer. My parents also had quite a few friends who died from it. However, I'm glad there will be a new addition to the family. I wouldn't know how to feel either since there are 2 things that are so opposite. I often have mood swings and mixed feelings.

Reply to
http://tacuma811.livejournal.com/22332.html?thread=389692#t389692
and
http://tacuma811.livejournal.com/22332.html?thread=390460#t390460

At least you enjoy your sport. I don't get fat because I have trouble eating, so I can't eat a lot.

Sorry you had a bad coach. Compared to him, Captain Tezuka is much better. At least he doesn't put others down. As I mentioned, looks mean very little to me, so if a person or character were rude, mean, arrogant, sneaky, etc., I would hate them even if they were very handsome or beautiful. Laps are actually part of training too, so Captain Tezuka assigning laps isn't all bad. I'm glad you thought the reasons for it in my fics were good.

It's true that it is often hard to tell what is good or bad, or what is right or wrong. That often stresses me out. Unfortunately, I have high (and possibly wrong) morals, values, and standards, so what many people consider good or fine is bad to me.

After watching TeniMyu and going over some manga chapters again, I do find that Yagyyu is at least not as bad as Niou. I can't forget about the bad RL things when I watch anime or read fiction, especially when those things are in the story to keep reminding me. It's good to make things realistic, but since RL is not pleasant, I want fiction to be pleasant. That's why rude, arrogant, and mean characters should be punished in fiction. It's related to getting attached to the characters of long anime or stories, then feeling terrible when they separate. Knowing that it is fiction makes it even more upsetting since producers have the choice to make them stay together. I wouldn't like it if the PoT characters had to take tests to enter high school, then get separated.

I agree that we don't read or watch PoT just to see Echizen. There are so many characters to follow, and though Echizen is overly-worshipped in that DL 1st scene, you could watch it for the Tezuka/Fuji part. The audience is also screaming there, meaning that many people like it.

I didn't find Echizen cuter without his memories. Maybe I was too bothered and disturbed by the amnesia ruining things to see the cuteness. It was harder for me to see the cuteness in the manga. Then again, I'm more interested in the story than how characters look, and the amnesia thing did nothing to improve the story. If they wanted to put in the amnesia thing, they should have made better use of it, such as Echizen losing, getting disqualified, or remaining that way, and expand more on its effects on the whole team as well as others. Besides, it's kind of impossible to play against so many players, and still be able to face the toughest player of all. People would be too exhausted by the time of the real match. They really should have Captain Tezuka beat Sanada, then they wouldn't have to worry about Echizen's memories. Maybe they wanted to have Captain Yukimura play. If that was the case, they should have put him in Singles 3 against Captain Tezuka. I would have liked to see the match between the 2 captains.

I like the chibi episodes, too, because they're cute, and I like cute things.

I didn't really mind being unable to see friends outside of school. Even if I wanted to see them, my parents wouldn't have let me. To tell the truth, I never really had friends in high school since people were so cliquey.

Knowing how something works helps. Unfortunately, by the time I figure it out, things change.

Unfortunately, the sea level is rising. It's dangerous if the coast is below sea level.

[tacuma811.livejournal.com]

It's alright, I know you're busy ^__^ I missed you too! I hope your computer problems will be over soon!

Today my grandmother called. The doctor had told her she really has cancer >_< It's really difficult. I can't feel really sad, but definitely not really happy either >_<

I don't have trouble eating. When I don't feel well, I start eating a lot ^^" I have to play sports.

True, Tezuka is a much better captain. I want a buchou like him! I do care about how a character looks. But I often like 'ugly' characters as well. But anime is my way of escaping the real world, so I would love to have my dream world a bit beautiful ^__^
I never have to run laps at practice, but we do have to run a lot.

I don't think you have wrong morals, values and standards. They might be different from most other people, but that doesn't mean they're wrong.

Yagyuu is good when he is with Kaidoh! I like how they work together.
I also want fanfiction to be happy. I don't mind if it's sad, as long as it has a happy end. Just like to you, it is also for me a way of escaping reality. I want my dreamworld to be the best, without the pain and hurt that real life has.

There are sooooo many TezuFuji fans! I think Konomi-sensei should make them an couple. And he shouldn't write about Echizen so much.

I thought Echizen without his memories was more cute in the anime. The way he looked at the tennis the others played was so cute.
I think so too. Echizen shouldn't have played. They have an extra player, so they could have changed somethings! Then Tezuka could have played Yukimura. I would love to see a match between the buchous!!

I don't like it when people are cliquey. I have 2 good friends at school. One of them I see also outside school. It's enough for me. I have some other friends, but I speak them mostly online.
Why won't they let you see friends?

That often happens to me as well. Things change too fast. I can't keep up ^_^"

True. We're gonna drown if th sea level keeps rising!

[speadee.livejournal.com]

Fortunately, I haven't had really major computer problems since last month, but I'm always nervous about it. I still get minor annoying problems on my computer.

Sorry about your aunt. I hope she'll be all right.

When I don't feel well, it's usually because of an upset stomach and trouble eating. I have an entry about it.

When the characters run laps, they're running a lot too.

To me, escape from real life includes people not caring about looks and putting personality as priority. However, it could also mean, as you said, no ugliness at all. The way I think and look at things seem to always be weird and different from others, and that includes my morals, values, and standards.

I need fiction to have a happy ending. At least that makes the sad parts more acceptable. However, I tend to have trouble with sad parts because I get teary and can have trouble eating. Still, I find myself rereading the sad parts with the happy ending of some fics over and over again. If I want to read tragedy, I'd rather just read a true story or watch the news since real life is full of tragedies.

I like the Yagyuu-Kaidou part, too. That showed their good sides. I had forgotten that part until I either saw it in TeniMyu or went through some of the manga again.

I agree that Echizen with amnesia seemed more cute in the anime. The amnesia thing could have been another way for them to focus more on Echizen, whom they're already focusing too much on, making everyone else seem unimportant. For example, they ended up not showing much of the Golden Pair's match because of the amnesia thing. They need to show more of other characters.

I think they should have had the Platinum Pair instead of Niou in singles and Yagyuu not playing. It would have been good to see the Golden Pair beat the Platinum Pair. Then they should have left out Kirihara. I was upset at what he did to Inui. Besides, he'll still be on the team next year while Yagyuu will graduate. With the Platinum Pair and no Kirihara, Yanagi would probably play singles. I guess they could have Fuji play against him, and the Emerald Pair could face Marui/Kuwahara. Those would be interesting match as well as the match between the tough captains.

I think I now talk to my online friends more than real life friends. I have real life friends that I keep in touch with. Unfortunately, people seem to become more and more cliquey. The people at my school are an example.

Things change too fast that I often feel left behind.

We all need to do something about the sea level as well as other environmental aspects.

[tacuma811.livejournal.com]

I'm glad you didn't have major computer problems. Those minor problems are annoying.

Thank you.

Yeah, they run so much laps! I can't do that!

It's not wrong to think differently, ne? The fact that my dream world is different from yours, doesn't mean yours is bad ^__^ You enjoy yours, I enjoy mine. And so we're all different.

Why do you reread sad parts? After reading a sad fic, I cry and then read a more happy fic. That makes me forget a little about the sad fic. RL has too many tragedies.

Yeah, I really liked the Yagyuu-Kaidoh part!

Indeed, if any of the others had amnesia, that person would get all the attention and Echizen wouldn't get much attention anymore. We indeed didn't get to see much of the Golden Pair's match! No fun >_<

I missed Yagyuu, I didn't like it that he didn't play. And Nioh is probably better in doubles than in singles. It would be good to see the Golden Pair beat the Platinum Pair. But maybe Jackal and Marui are better than the Platinum Pair. It's better to see the Golden Pair beat the best pair, ne?
Kirihara was really evil! He beated up Inui!

I think I do as well. But with one of my RL friends I talk a lot on the internet too. She is my beta, you probably heard of her ^__^

Yeah, we have to do something about the rising of the sea level, but it seems like most people don't care >_

[speadee.livejournal.com]

Computer problems are so annoying. Unfortunately, they occur often.

I would never be able to run so much either. I don't have the strength or endurance.

I don't find it wrong for people to think differently. Actually, that makes things interesting.

I reread sad parts only if they lead to the happy ending. I guess it's because I want to reread the happy ending, and the effect of it is greater if I read the parts before it, too. I guess it's related to my watching the last few scenes of Episodes 52 and 53: I like to see the happy ending of episode 53, but the effect is greater after watching teh last few scenes of Episode 52. Well, you know watching them too many times was probably what led to my fanfics.

The Yagyuu and Kaidou match showed us their good side. They were able to teach those players a lesson.

Even without the amnesia, Echizen gets too much attention, which isn't fair. I didn't like how we didn't get to see much of the Golden Pair's match. I also thought Niou was supposed to be more of a doubles player, and the Platinum Pair was undefeated and the best pair, even better than the Marui/Kuwahara pair.

I was really mad at Kirihara for injuring Inui. They should have had Yagyuu playing instead of him. Then I guess Yanagi would end up playing singles. It would have been good to see either Captain Tezuka or Fuji facing Yanagi. I think either one should have faced Sanada and won. I wonder if Fuji against Captain Yukimura would be a good match as well.

Were you talking about Akiko88? I think you mentioned about her being a RL friend. I keep in touch with my RL friends mostly through e-mail and FaceBook.

Unforutnately, many people do not care about the environment.

[tacuma811.livejournal.com]

I don't have the strengh to run so much either. But I would have it if I would train a bit more.

Yes, if all people would be the same, life would be really boring!

I never reread parts or stories (only really good stories), but I understand that a sad part makes the happy ending more beautiful. It was bad, but it all ended up good. Guess watching those episode indeed led to your fic ^__^

It's weird that the Platinum Pair doesn't play. But at the other side, I understand it. It wouldn't be fun if the matches were almost completely the same as the matches they had before!

Sanada should have lost and Yanagi should have played singles instead of Nioh. Fuji would have beated Yanagi and Inui and Kaidoh could beat Jackal and Marui, while the Golden Pair would beat the Platinum Pair!

It's easier to stay in touch with RL friend on the internet, ne?

[elysis.livejournal.com]

Please don't be sad Ann-chan, I'm sure your grandma will be alight, because all of us are praying. So don't worry ^^.

And I have to congrat your sister-in-law as well :). I hope she'll be alright too since pregnancy could be very difficult.

All in all, let's hope everything will be fine, and everyone will be happy ^^.

[tacuma811.livejournal.com]

I hope it will be alright. She is old and some treatments will be too heavy for her. She can't have them, because then the treatment will kill her. But thank you very much!

I also hope she will be alright. She was really tired, but that's only normal ^__^ Somehow I have the feeling it will be a boy. Before my nieces were born I had the idea both of them would be a girl and I was right. Wonder if I'm right this time as well XD